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Warrior Prayers - Day 15

Today's prayers for goodness lead to a much bigger issue.  As we seek to mold and correct our young boys, we absolutely must keep in mind that it is not the outward behavior that we are to focus on.  While it is important that they do not hit their brother (a big one in our home), or talk back to their parents (another challenge), and listen to instructions rather than ignore us, we will be doing them a huge disservice if we do not seek to change their hearts.  But what I have learned through praying these prayers this summer is that it is not up to us as parents to change our children's hearts.  That's God's job.  He wants their hearts more than we as their parents want them to have hearts for Him.  The last week of our praying for our sons' challenge has a day of "heart change" prayers.  So in disciplining them we must remember that we are after a change in their wanting to do good, not just the momentary behavior change.  They have to want to do the right thing every time, for the right reasons.  Brooke says, "Ask yourself these questions: 

What parenting tools have I been using that only focus on changing behavior and not the heart? Am I

willing to lay them down even if they produce what looks like a good child?

•

Reaching a child's heart takes time. Behavior modification is much faster! Am I willing to change things

about my life so that I have the time to invest in the hearts of my children?

•

Most importantly: Am I willing to submit my own heart to God and allow Him to mold me from the

inside out?

Shepherding our boys is not for the faint of heart friends! Once a week or more I'm tempted to just throw it all

out the window (including the boys … ) and take the easier path. So what keeps me going?"

Warrior Prayers Day 12

Today Brooke shares some insights given by author Laura Lee Groves, "I'm Outnumbered! One Mom's Lessons in the Lively Art of Raising Boys".  Sounds like she and I could be great friends.  I am also outnumbered in my home.  I always thought I would have both boys and girls.  Funny how my sister has three girls and I have the boys.  I had no idea what to do with my first son.  In fact I remember a conversation with my cousin when I was pregnant that I did not have any idea of how to raise a boy.  Well, now I have two and am so thankful for both of them.  They are funny, energetic, and full of craziness!  I have been constantly seeking a peaceful home for some time now.  


Laura mentioned something that struck home with me.  Spend time with our sons doing the things that they enjoy, even if we don't prefer to do those things.  For years I have stayed away from my husband's football and basketball games.  I don't like them and have no interest in them.  My grandmother used to tell me to learn to enjoy them.  Now that I have two sons who will no doubt follow in their father's steps I am seeing a huge benefit in learning to enjoy those things that I have disliked.  Bonding takes place in sharing those moments and I don't want to miss out on that.  As they get older, I will definitely want a relationship that is built on trust to be developed.  I want my sons to come to me as someone that they can talk to, not see me as someone who just did the necessary house work and disciplined them.  


She also mentioned how important it is as boy moms to find other boy moms to connect with.  Having a life-line really helps when the craziness seems too much.


Pray for our sons to have peace in their lives, peace in our homes, and peace in our raising them.  God says that we will find peace if we seek it wholeheartedly.

Warrior Prayers Day 10

Today's prayers really sum up all that we are praying for our sons.  Love.  Without love, God's love, we miss the mark on everything else.  Without God's love our sons will not experience all that God has planned for them.  I personally have struggled with loving others for years.  The pain from past relationships has placed a barrier between me and the world.  It is hard for me to let others in, especially new friends.  I definitely do not want my sons to struggle with this.  Learning how to love God's way at an early age will hopefully help them cope with difficult situations that are sure to come up over the years.  I want them to be prepared to handle disappointments God's way.  And I most especially want them to grow up loving each other.  Right now this is hard to see with the daily fights over this and that.  Prayer.  It is our only hope.  Pray that they will love when it seems impossible.  Pray that they will experience love in their marriages.  Pray most especially that they will really know how much God loves them. 

Brooke brought up another very important point.  The word love is used carelessly too often.  "I love this food", "I love that song", etc...  Real love only comes from God.  Brooke says "God and love are one and the same. There is no real love apart from God, and God is behind all real and genuine acts of love".

For me today's prayers are at the top of my list.

Warrior Prayers Day 9

I've been thinking of ways to teach our sons to honor others.  They will be presented with many opportunities in their lives, such as holding a door open, giving up their seat, or letting someone else go before them.  Simple acts of kindness.  Then there is the command to "honor his father and mother".  For some reason this is a huge problem in our house.  Currently a favorite toy has been in time-out and will remain there until a certain someone learns to show respect to his mother.  For three days in a row there must not be any trouble.  So far that is not happening.  Even just now, as I am writing this, I have had to stop to "remind" him that he is to get dressed for school.  His interpretation of that is to stand in the hall and bark at the dog.  "Honoring his mother"?  Not yet.  So we have lots of work to do.  Boy, as I pray through these I am being shown area after area of character traits that are severely lacking. 

Warrior Prayers Day 8

Today we will pray for our sons to have servant's hearts.  I have always loved giving.  Often I round up clothes and house things that we are no longer using and give to Good Will.  This week I was asked if I could help out the fire victims around Austin.  I told my 7 year old about this and asked if he would like to help by donating some of his toys.  This was his cue to place importance on everything he owed.  I would never ask him to give away his most favorite toys, but rather some that he no longer uses.  For some reason he could not part with anything and was most upset that I had asked.  As I rounded up my kitchen things to donate I was saddened that he had this attitude.  Had I created this in him somehow?  Or have I just not trained him enough in the joy of giving?  I ended up showing him the boxes I collected, but that still made no difference to him. 

On another note, his servant's heart is not developed at home.  Whenever I ask him to help me clean, most importantly his toys and clothes, his response is always something like "I didn't make that mess", "I don't know where anything goes", "I don't know how", or my favorite "I'm too tired,  you have to help me".  So today's prayers are another uphill battle for me.  Another exhausting challenge to overcome.  Another area where my sons really need God's hand guiding them to become more like Him.

Warrior Prayers Day 7

Today's topic, purity, may seem a little premature for my little ones, however with access to the internet and cable, it is even more important that we start as early as possible not only shielding their eyes and ears, but training them to steer away from such temptations.  "Be careful little eyes what you see".  It is things like this that make me want to remove the TV and computer from our home, along with any movies and music that are working against what I want to teach my sons.  Everyone has their own opinion of the Duggars, but I really like the way their children behave and are focused on pleasing God and their parents.  Everyone gets along (and I don't think it is just for the camera).  They have no outside influences that can steal their hearts and turn them away from what their parents have tried so hard to teach them.  With that said, I realize not all of us can live in isolation with a house full of kids to play with and both parents at home all day.  Not everyone has the opportunity to home school and even home church.  My sons are being put out into the world at such young ages.  So my job as mom is to train them now to recognize evil and run from it. 

I pray that as we pray through today's prayers for purity, we will see a definite change in our sons' hearts toward serving God and recognizing things right away that are not pleasing to Him.

Warrior Prayers Day Five

Today's prayers are for avoiding foolishness.  This seems an uphill battle to me.  My kids are constantly expressing themselves foolishly.  The choices they make and the words they choose are mostly self-centered.  Brooke says "There is no consideration in life more profound than, 'What will please me?'Children don't say those words, but such foolish thoughts are the underlying justifications for hundred of impulses every day. It is expressed in all the acts of disobedience, selfishness, willful temper, and compulsive self-love."  She explains how important it is to train our children to recognize the difference between the wise man and the foolish man.  So many examples of each are given in God's word.  By training our little boys now we have hope that they will stand on their own one day and make the right choice to be wise.  

Let's pray today with their future in mind, not just for today.  Let's pray that they will not only make wise decisions with their daily life now, but be so solid in this that they will not move from God's wisdom.

Warrior Prayers Day Four

Today's prayers are for integrity.  Brooke stresses that we can best train our sons in this area by the lives they see us lead.  This is one of those character traits that can best be taught by behaving in a Christ-like way in situations that most people would choose to act selfishly.  Some simple examples may include letting someone go ahead of you in a grocery line, a school car line, or just though a door.  Some more involved examples may be to give to someone in need such as our recent fire victims, or helping out our elderly neighbors. 

"Integrity can be defined as firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values or the quality or state of being complete or undivided."

This week I think we have all been looking at our own lives and desiring to change our examples we are giving to our children.  Short tempers, lack of patience, unkind words spoken to our husbands perhaps.  Our integrity or lack of is shown most clearly in the hardest times.  When we are tired, overworked, or just stressed by all that we have to be concerned with as moms, we must remain close to God and His Word.  Only then will our own lives be changed to reveal Jesus living in us.  And that is the example we need for our children.

Warrior Prayers Day Three

As I read Brooke's instructions for today I was convicted of something that is lacking in my parenting.  How often, way too often, I am quick to point out what my boys are doing wrong.  "You hit your brother AGAIN!"  "I thought you were supposed to be picking up your toys."  And the list goes on.  How much more effective I may be if I spend even half the time praising.  Little boys are not much different from grown men in that they thrive on praise.  Why do you think they want to be superheros so badly?  They love to come to the rescue, but are highly motivated by encouragement from us.  My husband is constantly reminding me of this.  And I am constantly forgetting it. 

Our sons obedience will be reinforced by our praise and encouragement much more than constantly nagging them or shaming them.  Sounds simple and obvious.  And I know how easy it is to get into the mode of being frustrated by the negative things they do over and over and over again.  As parents, Godly parents especially, we have the role of setting the example of holding our tongue, stepping back, and looking for the good that our children are doing.  Focus on that and I bet the rewards will come. 

As I am writing this I am most definitely reminding myself to do this.  Hopefully through praying for our sons' obedience we will see not only a change in their hearts, but a change in ours.

Let's remember to pray for their submission to their teachers as well as future bosses.  The groundwork we lay down now will pay off in later years.

Warrior Prayers: Day 2

Today we will pray for our sons to be obedient.  Not just to our leading, but to God and His ways.  Brooke explains that it is not enough for us to have our sons obey our every command.  We don't need little robots.  What we are after is a child who willingly obeys, out of a heart's desire to please God first and us second.

Brooke says "Obeying God is intimately linked to loving Him. If we focus too much on forcing our boys to change their outward behavior, and forget to hold out the great depth of love that sent a Savior to the cross, we’re running the risk of raising little Pharisees."

We need to instill a desire to obey coming from a deep love for our Savior. 

"Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be

loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him." ~John 14:21

Join me in praying for our sons throughout the day.  I will be posting on our Facebook group the Warrior Prayers.  

Warrior Prayers Day One

Day one's prayers for our sons will be combined with day two.  The first element we are encouraged to pray for for our sons is their Heart Change.  What I have learned from praying through these prayers this summer is that it is not up to us as moms (or dads) to change our children's hearts for God.  We can try as hard as we can, but our efforts will not produce the desired result without an intervention from Our Father.  Only He can turn our sons' hearts toward Him.  And that is our most fervent prayer, isn't it?  That our sons will be faithful followers of Christ all their days on this earth, and to meet us in Heaven some day.

Brooke gives a wonderful explanation of a glass of water and it spilling out everywhere if it is bumped.  She explains that the same glass would not spill over if it was empty.  The same way our actions and words reflect what is in our hearts.  If only evil, bad thoughts, bad words, and ungodly actions are buried in our hearts, then we can't expect anything else to come out, especially at the most trying of times.  How necessary it is to plant God's Word in our hearts so that our responses will be in line with His ways. 

"The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure

produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks." ~Luke 6:45

Answer to Prayer

Yesterday I received an answer to one of my prayers.  I have been sewing at our kitchen island and using a bar stool.  It was working out ok, but not the best situation given the amount of sewing I do for my business.  A few months ago it was brought up that I might receive my grandma's sewing table.  But as it turned out, my parents didn't have room in their SUV with all of the other things they were bringing back from CA that were hers.  So I continued to offer this up in prayer. 

One of my mom's club friends offered an old desk for free and I jumped when I received the email.  It took some fixing, but my husband is very handy.  He had to attach brackets so that it would not collapse on me.  And he even cut out a space in the back so I can reach the outlet easily.  How thoughtful!

I love my new work space and am looking forward to spending lots of hours sewing.  I am now able to teach my oldest to sew and hopefully will be able to add teaching to my business.

So thankful!

Taming Our Tongue

Confession:  I really messed up this weekend.  It is not an easy thing to admit.  But when I consider that I have walked away from God and His plans for me, I really have no choice.  The peace I was living in was removed.  I no longer felt His guidance (He didn't leave, He is always with us).  I just had made a very wrong choice and was suffering the consequences of my sin. 

What happened?   I had not really been living in peace like I thought.  I had been holding onto negative thoughts and feelings.  When they could not be contained any more, they were let loose.  And my husband was right there in the line of fire.  He was gentle and loving, as he should be, as understanding as possible.  But he was also there to quickly point out that I had sinned and was no longer walking in a right relationship with him or God. 

So, I of course felt bad and quickly confessed what I had done as sin.  But the consequences of my mistake still came.  That night, by no coincidence,  I developed symptoms of strep throat.  Sinning in my words had opened a doorway for Satan to enter and inflict his pain into my life.  In this case, as a direct result of words not used correctly, I was given a sickness in my throat. 

Today, three days later, I have received medical attention, am on medicine, and am feeling better.  But more importantly the peace has been restored.  I am back in a right relationship with my husband and with God.  Hopefully this lesson will be the last time I go around this mountain.  

I you feel like things are not quite right, check all areas.  Are you holding onto bitterness, resentment, anger, or jealously?  Better get rid of them fast!  They only grow and will develop bad attitudes, words, and will most likely lead you into sin.  BUT, He is always faithful.  He provided me a way out, I just didn't take it.  In fact, He provided two ways out, which I choose to ignore both times.  Trust in God to always lead and guide your thoughts and words.  Give Him your thoughts that are not pleasing to Him.  We have His power to not think on things that are not "lovely, honorable, just, right, and good".  Pray for a watch to be placed over your mind and mouth.  It really is necessary to having a right relationship with Him. 

Hearts and Home: A Reminder Of How Fast They Grow

Hearts and Home: A Reminder Of How Fast They Grow

Today's Challenge

I am going through 31 Days to Clean; Having a Martha House the Mary Way by Sarah Mae.  The challenges are easy to keep up with and really do have lasting results.  Not only will the reader have a "company-ready" house, but Sarah also encourages us as women and home-makers to re-evaluate our position in our homes to create a home filled with life and love. 

Today's challenge suggests we make a list of priorities to keep our homes, and lives in order.  At the top of my list is my time with God.  If I am not making this number one, I really feel the effects.  I rely on His strength and guidance throughout my day.  By beginning my mornings reading His Word and in prayer, I am connecting to my source of strength and wisdom. 

My number two priority is my husband.  I have been trying to create a home of peace for him and that is not an easy task.  It is important that our home is a safe place for our family to rest and relax.  If there is constant bickering with the children, or if the house is messy, there is tension all around.  However, by keeping peace with our boys, training them to handle their problems under God's direction, and by maintaining a clean house, there is a sense of calmness and order.

This leads me to my number three priority.  My children.  I am trying to follow God's Word to "train my children in the way of the Lord, and when they are old they will not depart from it".  So many bad habits have already formed, so I have a lot of untraining to do as well.  But I am confident that through much prayer for them (I am also going through Warrior Prayers - Praying the Word for Boys) and leading by example, they will learn to follow Jesus. 

My number four priority is my home.  For me this includes house cleaning and grocery shopping.  These are my two main jobs and I try my best to do them well.  I have adopted the Bible verse to work for the Lord instead of man as my motto.  When I worked outside of the home, I wasn't happy with my employers.  But I discovered this verse and it made my work experience much better.  I focused on working for Jesus instead of my earthly bosses.  Not that my "job" now is horrible, I actually love it.  But I am keeping my focus on Him so that when I am discouraged by the daily dishes, laundry, or bathrooms to clean ... again, I remain in a positive frame of mind.  The Bible says to not complain about anything, so I do not complain about the work that I have been given.  It is actually a joy to take care of my family in every way that I can.

And lastly number five is myself.  I have (again) started a workout schedule that I am hoping will stick.  My goal is to be "beach ready by 2012".  Not that we have a trip planned, but that is my goal.  I am by no means overweight.  The opposite in fact.  But I am not the most healthy eater.  So I am starting to eat better, cutting down on caffeine, adding fresh fruits and veggies, adding oats (Steel Cut Oatmeal is really good), and exercise a little every day.  So far this week has been a success.  Little changes at a time and I am able to stick with my commitments.

I look forward to updating my progress weekly.  I hope you will come back to see how we are doing with our life changes. 
May God Bless you in all you do,

Kerry

Duggar Book Give-away!

Enter to win the Duggar's new book over at "Her Noble Character".  I have added her blog button on my sidebar for easy access.  Just 4 simple steps to enter.  Love Love Love the Duggars!

Prayer Chain

I am requesting prayer for a family member. He is in his 20's, newly married, and has a 4 month old son. He has a brain tumor, had surgery last week, and has been given a diagnosis of stage 3 cancer.

I want to form a prayer chain to lift him up before our Father's throne. Prayer changes things and our words are very powerful when we speak words of faith.

Please join me in praying for him often. Believe with me for his complete healing.

2 Timothy 1:7 
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

1 Peter 2:24 
He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed.


His name is Josh.

Romans 10:8
"The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,"

Romans 10:17
Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.
 
In the midst of adversity, when the pressure is on, say only what God says.

Man has the spiritual capacity to contain every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God.  

Thank you
  

Doorpost's Giveaway

Be sure to stop by Far Above Rubies blog for your chance to win Doorpost's book For Instruction in Righteousness.  This is a wonderful teaching tool for your little ones.  I am looking forward to using Plants Grown Up this summer with my son.